As soon as a baby is born, they begin learning new skills at an incredible rate. Along with those new abilities, they also develop the confidence to use them. As children get older, their confidence becomes just as important as the skills themselves. They need it to thrive and to trust in their own capabilities while, at the same time, knowing that they can persevere and cope if they aren’t successful at something straight away.

It is through experiencing success and bouncing back from failure that children develop healthy self-confidence.

Some ways to help your child build self-confidence from a young age are:

Model confidence yourself – Children mimic everything you do. They are always watching and learning from you.

Don’t get upset about mistakes – Everyone makes mistakes, and children will make plenty as they are learning. If your child gets something wrong or doesn’t do something the correct way, stay calm and let them know that it is okay. Encourage them to try again together, always using a calm voice.

Encourage your child to try new things – For example, if your child is old enough, let them help you prepare dinner. Give them a suitable board and child-safe utensil and, with close supervision, allow them to help prepare vegetables or fruit.

For a younger child, they may want to walk up two steps alone. Let them try while you stand close behind, ready to support them if needed.

You may be surprised by how much children can do from a young age when they are given the opportunity to try.

Celebrate effort – Celebrate your child for trying. It is very important for them to know that it is okay to try new things, and this will give them the confidence to continue doing so.

For example, let your baby explore their food and make a mess. This is how they feel and taste different things for the first time. It is a sensory experience for them.

For older children, let them try using scissors with supervision and talk about the right and wrong ways of behaving when using them, so they can begin to understand the rules.

Remember to praise your child each step of the way.

Embrace imperfection – A good example of this is something I have seen many times over the years while teaching. Parents would ask me why their child’s artwork was not perfect or why it looked different from what other children had created.

As a parent, you need to remember that no two children are the same and they will all express themselves differently. This is what makes us individual and unique.

If your child’s owl is not perfect, perhaps the eyes are not in the ‘right’ place, that is okay. It is their work and how they want it to be.

Tell your child it is amazing and that you love it just the way it is. Hang it somewhere in the house so your family and your child can see and enjoy it for a few days or more.

Don’t pretend to be perfect either. As we all know, there is no such thing as perfect.

Let your child make some decisions – When children are given opportunities to make decisions from a young age, they gain confidence in their own judgement.

I’m not saying let your child rule the house, but allow them to make a few simple decisions.

For example:

What clothes would they like to wear that day?
Would they like to walk or ride a scooter to the park?
What vegetables should you have for dinner?

Giving them two or three simple choices a day is more than enough.

Promote Problem Solving – Children become more confident when they are able to think through situations and negotiate what they want.

The key here is sometimes to bite your tongue.

If your child comes to you and says that another child took their toy at the playground, ask your child what they think would be a good way of getting it back.

Even if their first idea is simply taking it back, ask what they think might happen if they did that.

Then ask, “Can you think of another way to get it back so that doesn’t happen?”

It may take some time for your child to grasp this idea. However, you are helping them build the foundations of problem-solving, and as they get older, the questions you ask can develop with them.

As always, don’t forget to praise them where appropriate.

And finally, help your child find their passion through exploring their interests.

Finally, help your child discover what they enjoy by giving them opportunities to explore their interests.

As parents, we may want our children to take part in the same sports or activities we enjoyed when we were young. However, your child may not share the same interests or passions.

Ask your child what they like and what they want to do.

For example, I wanted my daughter to play football, but she wanted to play rugby, and now she is amazing at rugby!

My son is two-and-a-half and enjoys climbing, jumping, swinging, tumbling and balancing on everything he can. By observing what he loves to do, I decided to enrol him in gymnastics so that he can learn safe ways to enjoy all those activities.

“Childhood is a journey, not a race.”

Remember that. 🙂

Make sure you spend quality time with your children and, most importantly, have fun with them along the way.

 

Mrs Janine Brindopke
Former Nursery Manager
Jumeirah International Nurseries, Downtown Dubai